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Hi!! This is page... ONEEEEE...of MYYY..... ONLINE DIARY...
Might be a boring read for some, so... I added a button above that plays music!! Click it, click it!!! Also, disclaimer, I didn't make the music. The one and only TOBY FOX did!! You might recognize that name if you've ever seen UNDERTALE.
Anyway... back to me. It's currently 12:53AM. My entire sleep schedule's been flipped around... It's horrible! I've already asked my father to buy me some melatonin from the pharmacy yesterday, but I think he forgot... So here I am. I slept at like...2PM, because I did an all nighter. I woke up at 8PM. It's not SO bad, but I really wanna try waking up early from now on. I can't though, no matter how hard I try. AGGGHHHHH.... I have so many struggles right now it's making my head hurt. I don't know how to explain any of them. It's killing me... Oh how I'd love to wake up at 6AM, knowing I have more than half the day left. I want my days to go by slower in certain occasions. No, I want them to go slow all the time... I don't want to watch the days pass by knowing I haven't done anything. I keep telling myself I'll take my medication and have a productive day, but end up staying awake til the next afternoon. I don't know what to say about myself anymore. Except...it sure is easier to write here than on paper. My hands move as fast as my mind does, so I don't waste so much time writing. ...Should I add a comment section here? I wanna hear if you guys have suffered anything similar. I want you guys to share your thoughts and opinions, if you're really there. LOL.. I feel crazy talking to an imaginary audience. So is this more like a forum, journal or a diary? I feel like calling it a journal is more fitting since I'm also writing down some personal feelings. I searched it up. For the first time ever, I now know what the difference between a journal and a diary is. If you're too lazy to search it up yourself and want some extra knowledge (no, don't worry. me too), a diary focuses on recording daily events or personal experiences in chronological order—and a journal focuses in a more deeper way on the writer's personal feelings, thoughts, ideas, and reflections. I guess journaling is better, huh? Eons better than doomscrolling, actually. ...Gets a bit boring, though... not gonna lie.
Update, 01:41AM. Agghh... scrolling through all of these pretty sites... I love how glamorous and different they all are. I feel kind of useless. I don't know if I can do as good, but I pursued something good, and that's what matters. I try to tell myself that. Over and over again. It's okay. I'll try tomorrow. I'm okay. Sometimes I just can't help my envy.